


Christmas Caroling With Shawn Spencer by MusicalLuna

by MusicalLuna



Category: Psych
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Caroling, Dialogue-Only, Gen, Humor, Originally Posted on Psychfic, Songfic, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2018-02-03
Packaged: 2019-03-13 07:34:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13565838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MusicalLuna/pseuds/MusicalLuna
Summary: Christmas is never dull with Shawn Spencer.





	1. Baby, You're a Mean One

**Author's Note:**

> Shawn just randomly started singing Christmas songs in my head this afternoon and when Juliet got involved, I had to transcribe the results. So I blame this completely on Shawn.
> 
> Enjoy, if you dare.
> 
>  **Disclaimers:** Neither the songs nor the characters are mine. The idea isn't even really mine.
> 
>  **Shawn:** No, that'd be mine. *preens* Requests? Anyone? Anyone? I'll be here all week. 
> 
> Keep in mind that this isn't a regularly structured fic. Bare minimum. ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keep in mind that this isn't a regularly structured fic. Bare minimum. ;)

**Shawn:** (singing) Baby, it's cold outside.

 **Juliet:** Shawn, we live in Santa Barbara.

 **Shawn:** Ooh, baby, it's cold outside.

 **Juliet:** It's seventy-five degrees out, Shawn.

 **Shawn:** I'm lucky that you dropped in.

 **Juliet:** I didn't drop in, YOU did.

 **Shawn:** Look out the window at that storm.

 **Juliet:** It's sunny. Like always.

 **Shawn:** Man, your lips look--

 **Juliet:** Don't finish that sentence if you'd like to continue breathing.

~ * Later That Day... * ~

 **Shawn:** (singing) You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch.

 **Lassiter:** Oh, god. For the love of Miranda, _don't sing_ , Spencer.

 **Shawn:** You really are a heel.

 **Lassiter:** What did I just say?

 **Shawn:** You're as cuddly as a cactus,

 **Lassiter:** Keep it up and I'll show you just how cuddly a cactus can be.

 **Shawn:** You're as charming as an eel.

 **Lassiter:** SPENCER.

 **Shawn:** Mr. Grinch.

 **Lassiter:** Get away from me or I swear I'll-

 **Shawn:** You're a foul one, Mr. Grinch.

 **Lassiter:** There's more?!

 **Shawn:** You're a nasty, wasty skunk.

 **Lassiter:** Will somebody shut him the hell up?!

 **Shawn:** Your heart is full of unwashed socks

 **Lassiter:** I refuse to be held responsible for what happens if this continues for ONE MORE SECOND.

 **Shawn:** Your soul is full of gunk.

 **Lassiter:** I'll give you until the count of three to get the hell out of my sight, Spencer.

 **Shawn:** (running) MR. GRINCH.

 


	2. Deck the Halls with Jingle Bells

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the madness continues.

**Shawn:**  Deck the halls with boughs of holly!

 **Karen:**  Mr. Spencer!

 **Shawn:**  Fa la la la la, la la la la!

 **Karen:**  Mr. Spencer, what do you think you’re doing?!

 **Shawn:**  ‘Tis the season to be jolly!

 **Karen:**  Mr. Spencer, that is  _enough_.

 **Shawn:**  Fa la la la la, la la la la!

 **Karen:**  You can’t put tinsel there—

 **Shawn:**  Don we now our gay apparel!

 **Karen:**  I do NOT want a garland boa, Mr. Spencer!

 **Shawn:**  Fa la la la la, la la la la!

 **Karen:**  Those lights are a fire hazard, take them down now!

 **Shawn:**  Troll the ancient yuletide carol

 **Karen:**  MR. SPENCER, I DEMAND YOU STOP THIS INSTANT.

 **Shawn:**  Fa la la la la, la la laaa laaaaaaaaaaaaa!

 ~ * Even Later That Day * ~ 

 **Shawn:**  Jingle bells!

 **Buzz:**  Jingle bells!

 **Shawn and Buzz:**  Jingle all the way!

 **Shawn:**  Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one horse open sleigh.

 **Buzz:**  Hey!

 **Shawn:**  Jingle bells!

 **Buzz:**  Jingle bells!

 **Shawn and Buzz:**  Jingle all the way!

 **Buzz:**  Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one horse open sleigh.

 **Shawn:**  Hey!

 **Buzz:**  Dashing through the snow

 **Shawn:**  In a one horse open sleigh

 **Buzz:**  O’er the fields we go

 **Shawn:**  Laughing all the way

 **Buzz and Shawn:**  HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

 **Shawn:**  Bells on bobtails ring

 **Buzz:**  Making spirits bright

 **Shawn:**  What fun it is to ride and sing

 **Buzz and Shawn:**  A sleighing song tonight!

 **Lassiter:**  Why me?


	3. Santa Claus'll Be Home For Christmas

**Shawn:** (singing) He sees you when you’re sleeping.

**Gus:** That was you, Shawn!

**Shawn:** He knows when you’re awake.

**Gus:** You’re the one who wakes me up!

**Shawn:** He knows if you’ve been bad or good,

**Gus:** Oh, right, because you’re the best person to judge that, Shawn.

**Shawn:** So be good for goodness sake!

**Gus:** I am good Shawn. It’s you who’s bad.

**Shawn:** Oh! You better watch out!

**Gus:** Knock it off, Shawn!

**Shawn:** You better not cry!

**Gus:** OUCH! SHAWN!

**Shawn:** You better not pout I’m—OW, GUS!

**Gus:** Serves you right.

~ * That Evening * ~

**Shawn:** (singing) I’ll be home for Christmas.

**Henry:** Not if you keep singing you won’t be.

**Shawn:** You can plan on me.

**Henry:** I always plan on you. I plan on you making a mess out of things.

**Shawn:** Please have snow, and mistletoe.

**Henry:** This is Santa Barbara, Shawn, and there’s no way I’m putting up mistletoe. Don’t you remember the last time?

**Shawn:** And presents on the tree.

**Henry:** Don’t count on it. I’m taking them back tonight.

~ * * * ~

**Everyone:** We wish you a Merry Christmas; 

We wish you a Merry Christmas; 

We wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

 


End file.
